Words Hurt
by Chance
Summary: Things are said and Bridger comforts Lucas. non "steps" universe.


Disclaimer: Don't own it, never have, never will 

Rateg: PG-13

Notes: Okay, got bored, this is the result -g-. Blatantly hurt/comfort because I needed a fix..hehe

Thank you Mel and ELFy -g- 

Also, another writer wrote a sequel to this. She did a fabulous job! It's on my page which you can get to from my author profile (plug?..me? nah...hehe)

Lucas at in the small compartment, knees drawn up to his chest, his arms hugging them tightly. All of the lights were off, making the small area pitch black. he couldn't even see the hand in front of his face, and he was grateful for the solitude.

He was crammed into a little know space by the engines. It had originally been built to house an extra piece of equipment, but design improvements had rendered the little room useless, at least for engine purposes. Lucas had stumbled onto it one night when he had been out roaming the ship. It had quickly became a sanctuary, the one place he could go for privacy and no one could find him. Except one person.

He'd told the Captain about it one night after Bridger had been nearly frantic because he couldn't find him. It had been almost 3 in the morning after all, and relatively speaking, it was a small ship. Bridger had come in to check on him for some reason, and had been unable to find him. A quick search through the boat revealed nothing, and he had been about to call Crocker from bed when Lucas had appeared at the door.

Nathan had made him promise never to do it again, and had demanded to know where he had been. Seeing the fear still lingering on the older man's face, Lucas had explained about the room. Surprisingly, Nathan hadn't been mad, instead he'd promised to keep it a secret, as long as the boy left behind some kind of symbol that he had gone there. Lucas had taken to leaving a certain book out in the open for Nathan to find.

Lucas clenched his knees tighter when he heard footsteps approaching, knowing it could only be one person. He buried his face into his knees when the small hatch slid open and Nathan crawled through. The captain had to half stoop in the room, and even then he was uncomfortable. The room was no more than five feet by five feet, and about five feet tall. Not a place to live in, but perfect to hide in.

Nathan stopped for a minute, hearing Lucas' muffled breathing in the room, and he angled his head in it's direction.

"Lucas?" he asked. He heard a low, breathy sob squeeze out and he reached out, grasping the boy's leg, guiding himself over until he sat down next to him. He put his arm around the boy's shoulder, squeezing Lucas to him when he felt the boy try to squirm away. Lucas remained rigid next to him, his arms still locked around his legs. His face still buried in his knees.

"Lucas," Nathan said again, "I was getting worried about you. You were supposed to be on the bridge an hour ago. What happened?" he asked gently. Lucas shook his head quickly, not wanting to talk about it. Subconsciously, he snuggled under Nathan's arm, drawing in comfort without fully realizing he was doing it. Nathan felt it and hugged him tighter, doing what he could to comfort him.

"Come on pal, you know you can tell me anything." Lucas trembled under his arm, a few tears squeezing out from his eyes. Nathan felt him tremble and sighed, not liking it that the boy was in so much pain. He cared about him too much to sit by and let it happen.

"It's okay," Nathan whispered soothingly, pulling Lucas even closer to him. He felt Lucas struggle against him, and Nathan knew the boy was close to breaking down. Without thinking about it fully, Nathan reached over and pulled Lucas into his lap, forcing the boy's head to lay on his shoulder. He put his arms around him, holding him tightly when Lucas tried to break away, a loud sob breaking from the boy's lips.

Lucas felt the captain's arms tighten around him as he tried to get away. His emotions were too raw, too close to the surface for him to be able to take comfort from this man. He feared that if his emotions were allowed to break through, that they might never stop, and the captain would see how much he needed him. And walk away. Just like they all did. He felt the scalding tears pour down his cheeks, and he bit his lip to keep from sobbing.

He felt the captain start to stroke his hair, squeezing him tightly. Lucas couldn't hold it in anymore and he lost it. His tears came fast and furiously, pouring down his cheeks, and his chest heaved with his sobs. He burrowed his head into Nathan's shoulder, not caring anymore that the captain might realize how much he needed him. Lucas' need for comfort was too great, and his heart was hurting too much for him to control it.

Nathan rocked him gently, continuing to stroke his hair. He didn't know what was wrong, but he was willing to sit here all night and find out. All thoughts of the bridge, or the paperwork he still had to fill out, flying out of his head. He felt Lucas' sobbing begin to subside and his body slowly stop shaking, as the feeling of being comforted gradually managed to work its way through him. 

Lucas relaxed into the captain's arms. The boy was very happy for the darkness surrounding them as embarrassment of him blubbering all over the captain set in. Nathan squeezed him tightly again.

"C'mon kiddo. Please tell me?" Lucas sighed, his head dropping tiredly against Nathan's chest. He closed his eyes and listened to the captain's heart beat, trying to decide how much to tell. He shifted a bit, his eyes looking absently at the place where Nathan's head would have been if there had been any light.

"It's nothing, some guys were making fun of me earlier. No bid deal." Nathan shook his head slightly, his hand still stroking Lucas' hair absently.

"I don't think so pal, I think it was worse than you say. What happened? Exactly?" Lucas shut his eyes, knowing he wasn't going to get out of this anytime soon.

"I was in the moonpool with Darwin, we were over by the edge, so they didn't see me when they started talking. One of them was like "So, did you see what the captain's pet did today?" And then the other guy laughed and said "Yeah, stupid little fool tripped going _up_ the stairs." Then they both laughed. Then one of them said-" Lucas broke off, his body starting to shake again. He pushed himself onward, knowing that if he didn't get it out now, he wasn't going to. "He said "Yeah, it's no wonder his own parents don't even like him. He can't even walk straight." and the other guy said "No kidding. How much do you think thet're paying Bridger to keep him on the boat? Probably a small fortune." Then they laughed and left," Lucas finished softly. 

Bridger held him tightly, his chin resting on top of the boy's head. People could be so cruel sometimes! If he ever found out who those two crewmen were, they 'd be in for some serious discipline measures.

"They were just stupid Lucas. No one is paying me anything to keep you here. I _like_ having you here, and you're nobody's pet." He felt Lucas nod slowly, but he knew the teen didn't really believe it. He was just humoring the captain. Nathan knew there was really nothing he could say to Lucas to make the hurt go away. The boy had been brought up to not depend on adults. In any way, and Nathan had to constantly fight against that, and show Lucas that there was another side to life besides what his parents had shown him. It was an uphill battle, but slowly but surely, he felt he was making headway. Setbacks like this didn't help matter any though.

He continued to hold Lucas, just holding him until he felt the boy's breathing even out, showing that he was finally asleep. By that time, Nathan figured they had been in the little room for almost two hours. He shifted, trying to work the circulation back into his legs enough to get them out of there. Lucas mumbled softly in his sleep and Nathan froze, not wanting to wake him up.

He looked around, imagining exactly where the walls and the ceiling were in the blackness. He remembered having to crawl in through the hatchway just to get in the room. there was no way he was going to be able to get Lucas out of there without waking him up. Sighing, Nathan settled back against the wall, pulling Lucas more securely against him. He resigned himself to the fact that they would be in there all night. He just had to hope no one worried and set off a panic on the boat.

THE END


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